Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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