The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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