so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
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