yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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