i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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