I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
