just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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