the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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