i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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