Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I looked at my own cervix.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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