to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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