Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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