I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you will always have a special place in my vag
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
