I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
