I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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