ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
