Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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