i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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