Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We need to rekindle our bromance
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
