bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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