the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
