Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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