I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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