playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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