In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
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I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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