you turned your livingroom into a bong?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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