Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize