i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
