Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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