We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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