why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
the day after is always just damage control
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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