So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
This is the high leading the old right now
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
