All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob