Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
