Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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