i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
