Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
i've created a new STD.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
