How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
