Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
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He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
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I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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