how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.