I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize