Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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