STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
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