i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize