Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
