Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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