Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
