But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
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