Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Randomize