Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
