Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Farmville is her only friend.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
