There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
