PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
whose ass print is on the piano?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
MIDGETS
????
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
