I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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